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Building Self Confidence

Empower Up and Win From the Inside Out!
By Valencia Ray, MD

Friday 05 August, 2016.

Building self-confidence is surely the on-going pursuit of each aware and striving individual. But how to do it successfully and authentically?

I am always on the look out for any advice that resonates with my belief in building our true selves, getting to know who we really are and just helping us in living everyday better – real stress relief. This article on building self-confidence resonated loud and clear…

Read it and enjoy the good advice!


Confidence from my point of view is about letting go of the stories that block the light and power that you already are.

It is about, as Robert Browning said:

“There is an inmost center in us all, where truth abides in fullness;….and, to know, rather consists in opening out a way where the imprisoned splendour may escape, than in effecting entry for a light supposed to be without.”

We’ve had it backwards for so long. From the time we were children, we have been conditioned, via ignorance, to look for our security, love and self-esteem outside of ourselves. We look around the landscape and compare our worth relative to others, based on external values of gender, race, culture, class and even clothing.

These are all just judgments made from a wounded ego, the storytelling part of the brain. These are the ways of victim consciousness and it is totally disempowering. The confidence that I speak of comes from “core confidence” which is an inside job… Building self-confidence from the inside out.

I can sense, through intuition and from listening to others, that these changing times of ours are shifting this tide. I have a sense that there is a sense of restlessness. A growing number of people are looking for some new answers to some old questions such as:


  1. Who am I?
  2. Why am I here?
  3. Why do I believe what I believe
  4. What is life about?

For the most part, the stories of who we think we are were written from a foundation rooted in FEAR – the fiction accepted as Truth when in reality it was only a way of interpretation, a story that covered over the Light of our being, our Authentic Self. The challenge is that if it is “true” for you, it will create your experience via your nervous system.


building self confidenceIn our brains, we have an area called “autobiographical memory” which, via our conclusions and thus formed perceptions, we create a “Mental Me” – the story of who we think we are. Be aware though, that as a whole, these deeply rooted conclusions were formed by you unconsciously often before the age of seven when you were most illogical and a bundle of shifting emotions.

In other words, who you think you are was formed in the mind/brain of a child who still believed in the boogeyman under the bed. The way to empower up, truly empower yourself, and building self-confidence is to realize that you are more than your stories and you are more than “only human”. This is the starting point. You must open your mind to new ideas from science and learn to trust your own intuitive guidance.

Then you learn how to retrain your brain, via updating your information, and opening your mind to use energy awareness and tools that can go to the root of these stories. As you retrain your brain, you can eliminate the “blind spots” that are covering your inner splendour, that “Magnificent Me” instead of continuing to look for your power and love in all the wrong places. And building self-confidence comes within your control. This works and the change can be made as fast as you are willing to commit and evolve…

This is not about “fixing” yourself for you are not “broken”.

It is about awakening and remembering, getting in touch with your spirit, your Authentic Self, your purpose and having the courage, the “Core Confidence” to release the cellular memory, the energetic stories that are hanging out in your nervous system.

Yes, you have/are an inner spirit, yet you live in a physical body. Learning how to operate your own brain and mind consciously is the door to empowering yourself for lasting change, spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically – truly building self-confidence. These stories limit everything from business success to the level of good health you experience. You can only accomplish this sort of lasting change with awareness from the inside out. What do you think?


About the Author: Valencia Ray MD is a former eye surgeon who with clear intention sold her medical practice to now show women entrepreneurs and professionals how to eliminate blind spots that block their true potential and limits their vision for business success, happy relationships and good health.

If you enjoyed reading this article, you might enjoy having a look at our articles on stress – we have chosen articles which we feel add value and good advice for living better everyday.

Go from Building Self Confidence to DIY Stress Relief Home Page


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